The fear of being perceived is truly one of the most crippling experiences. It keeps you from truly living and then makes you fear death. I’m still struggling with this, but essays like this help me gain more clarity. It was lovely reading this.
“If we are always performing, always angling for the best lighting in someone else’s perception, at what point do we become a distortion of our own making?” I love this line so much.
I love this! On the flip side, how beautiful and uniquely human it is to be perceived. I perceive so many people in my life that I am not close with as great parents, amazing friends, a little quirky (and that's okay), or... a good person. How wonderful it is to be perceived as a good mother, friend, daughter, teacher, etc.
This put so many of my fleeting thoughts and fears into one brilliant and articulate text. Really put something that I’ve been struggling with right on the spot. Thank you for writing this!
absolutely incredible, being perceived is horrifying and it keeps so many inside of a shell. But the beauty of being perceived by others is that it can be in a positive light as well. You’re an incredible writer. I’m def going to read more of your stuff
Don’t forget the power of self perception. Nothing can take that away from us. With a strong sense of self and a willingness to reject hurtful ideas we can overcome any fear of misperception.
What we feed grows. Stop feeding your fears and spend time nourishing the parts of yourself that make life exciting. The more we do this the more we spread a happy ideal and in turn influence other perceptions in a positive light!
If you are truly fearful you would acknowledge and distance yourself from that fear. If perception is not a reflection of reality but a creation of it, then turn that inwards and let the steps taken in opposition of your fear lead you to a happy life.
I’m still working on simplifying my ideas more clearly. Hopefully that makes sense :)
loved this. i talk about this all the time in therapy of how this is my biggest fear. being misunderstood. losing control to the wrong people. it almost feels like losing power in myself. its so hard. especially in todays world, there are so many people who can't grasp empathy. we have lost our kindess for each other. not everyone but too many people. i love the idea of finding peace in being misunderstood. because is it really even possible to achieve such a perfect image in someones mind? probs not! i feel as you get older, as you gain more concrete friendships or relationships, it might be easier to let yourself be
I believe that we make peace with it, to be human is knowing who you are when no one knows who are you. because when you die, you will have lived not the image that you thought people wanted
One of the greatest things I ever did for myself was being okay with being misunderstood. I found peace in my complexity and paradoxes, and it doesn’t fill me with anxiety anymore to think about what version of me exists in the minds of people I’ve long left behind or will one day encounter. I loved the conclusion in this ❤️ thank you
I understand the importance of letting go and accepting that we can’t fully control how others perceive us. It’s a freeing idea—to just be ourselves without constantly worrying about external opinions. But here’s where I struggle: perception still holds so much weight. Even if we don’t have control over how people see us, their perceptions can shape the opportunities we get, the way we’re treated, and even the direction our lives take.
So, while we’re told to release the need for control and live authentically, it’s hard to ignore the fact that how we’re perceived can impact us deeply. That’s the internal conflict I’m facing—if perception has so much power, yet we have so little control over it, what are we supposed to do?
You’re right—perception does have real consequences, and it can shape opportunities, relationships, and outcomes. The point of letting go isn’t about pretending perception doesn’t matter, but recognizing that we can’t micromanage it without losing ourselves. What we can control is showing up with integrity, staying true to our values, and choosing how we respond. It’s not a perfect solution, but it’s a balance between authenticity and awareness.
really well put☹️ i don’t know how many times i’ve distanced myself just bcus i didn’t want to be perceived, i don’t think growing out of this fear will be easy any time soon and it doesn’t help that the people around me just don’t get this part of me.. i hope to live the way i want without any fear of what people think of my existence one day🤍
“To be human is to be misperceived” wow??? i absolutely loved every bit of this!!!!
A.I. Slop....
? what
That's okay..it has fulfilled its purpose.To heal and create awareness.I don't mind the source.
Thank you for this reply, truly
This is obviously A.I.
I wasnt aware there was an AI checker but it is definitely ai. I literally smell it how could you not?
how?
what makes you say that?
Run it through a AI checker
To whoever is reading this, may you perceive others with empathy. 🥹
This is a beautiful perspective ♥️
The fear of being perceived is truly one of the most crippling experiences. It keeps you from truly living and then makes you fear death. I’m still struggling with this, but essays like this help me gain more clarity. It was lovely reading this.
Like what if I died today would they understand what I lived for
“If we are always performing, always angling for the best lighting in someone else’s perception, at what point do we become a distortion of our own making?” I love this line so much.
I love this! On the flip side, how beautiful and uniquely human it is to be perceived. I perceive so many people in my life that I am not close with as great parents, amazing friends, a little quirky (and that's okay), or... a good person. How wonderful it is to be perceived as a good mother, friend, daughter, teacher, etc.
And not only that, but to be perceived and understood as we perceive and understand ourselves!! Definitely a seldom yet magical thing.
This put so many of my fleeting thoughts and fears into one brilliant and articulate text. Really put something that I’ve been struggling with right on the spot. Thank you for writing this!
Thank you so much for saying that!
A.I. Slop....
absolutely incredible, being perceived is horrifying and it keeps so many inside of a shell. But the beauty of being perceived by others is that it can be in a positive light as well. You’re an incredible writer. I’m def going to read more of your stuff
Don’t forget the power of self perception. Nothing can take that away from us. With a strong sense of self and a willingness to reject hurtful ideas we can overcome any fear of misperception.
What we feed grows. Stop feeding your fears and spend time nourishing the parts of yourself that make life exciting. The more we do this the more we spread a happy ideal and in turn influence other perceptions in a positive light!
If you are truly fearful you would acknowledge and distance yourself from that fear. If perception is not a reflection of reality but a creation of it, then turn that inwards and let the steps taken in opposition of your fear lead you to a happy life.
I’m still working on simplifying my ideas more clearly. Hopefully that makes sense :)
loved this. i talk about this all the time in therapy of how this is my biggest fear. being misunderstood. losing control to the wrong people. it almost feels like losing power in myself. its so hard. especially in todays world, there are so many people who can't grasp empathy. we have lost our kindess for each other. not everyone but too many people. i love the idea of finding peace in being misunderstood. because is it really even possible to achieve such a perfect image in someones mind? probs not! i feel as you get older, as you gain more concrete friendships or relationships, it might be easier to let yourself be
I believe that we make peace with it, to be human is knowing who you are when no one knows who are you. because when you die, you will have lived not the image that you thought people wanted
One of the greatest things I ever did for myself was being okay with being misunderstood. I found peace in my complexity and paradoxes, and it doesn’t fill me with anxiety anymore to think about what version of me exists in the minds of people I’ve long left behind or will one day encounter. I loved the conclusion in this ❤️ thank you
I understand the importance of letting go and accepting that we can’t fully control how others perceive us. It’s a freeing idea—to just be ourselves without constantly worrying about external opinions. But here’s where I struggle: perception still holds so much weight. Even if we don’t have control over how people see us, their perceptions can shape the opportunities we get, the way we’re treated, and even the direction our lives take.
So, while we’re told to release the need for control and live authentically, it’s hard to ignore the fact that how we’re perceived can impact us deeply. That’s the internal conflict I’m facing—if perception has so much power, yet we have so little control over it, what are we supposed to do?
You’re right—perception does have real consequences, and it can shape opportunities, relationships, and outcomes. The point of letting go isn’t about pretending perception doesn’t matter, but recognizing that we can’t micromanage it without losing ourselves. What we can control is showing up with integrity, staying true to our values, and choosing how we respond. It’s not a perfect solution, but it’s a balance between authenticity and awareness.
Just be ourselves, bc we are damned if we do, and damned if we don’t… 💕
really well put☹️ i don’t know how many times i’ve distanced myself just bcus i didn’t want to be perceived, i don’t think growing out of this fear will be easy any time soon and it doesn’t help that the people around me just don’t get this part of me.. i hope to live the way i want without any fear of what people think of my existence one day🤍
as someone who has a lot of anxiety of being perceived , this healed some parts of me.. THANK U SM ❤️
Loved! Especially the paragraph about Misconception.
Thank you so much!
A.I. Slop....
Why do you perceive this to be AI? What are the indicators?
That's a lot of effort but I don't think we care about the source 🙂
Wow! ironically this essay made me feel seen.
Thank you!!🫶